{"id":305,"date":"2019-08-28T22:41:07","date_gmt":"2019-08-28T22:41:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/myunheardvoice.org\/?page_id=305"},"modified":"2019-08-28T22:41:07","modified_gmt":"2019-08-28T22:41:07","slug":"self-care-for-friends-and-family","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/myunheardvoice.org\/ru\/self-care-for-friends-and-family\/","title":{"rendered":"Self Care for Friends and Family"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>It\u2019s important to know that there is no normal or one way to react \nwhen you find out someone you care about has survived an act of sexual \nviolence. Regardless of what you\u2019re feeling, these emotions can be \nintense and difficult to deal with. Learning how to manage these \nfeelings can help you support the survivor in your life and can help you\n feel less overwhelmed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>How am I supposed to react? <\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>There is no \u201cright\u201d reaction to hearing that someone you care about \nhas survived an act of sexual violence. You may experience some of the \nfollowing emotions:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li><strong>Anger.&nbsp;<\/strong>You might feel \nanger for a number of reasons: towards yourself for not being able to \nprotect the survivor; towards the survivor for telling you about \nsomething that is hard to hear, or because they waited a period of time \nbefore telling you; or towards the perpetrator for carrying out the \nassault and hurting the survivor. It can be difficult to keep anger from\n affecting the way you communicate. Let yourself acknowledge this \nemotion and find another outlet to express it.<\/li><li><strong>Anxiety.<\/strong>&nbsp;You might feel anxious about responding \nthe \u201cright\u201d way or worried about how this event will impact your \nrelationship with the survivor. Reassure the survivor that the assault \nwas not their fault and that you believe them. These can be the most \npowerful and helpful words for a survivor to hear.<\/li><li><strong>Confusion.&nbsp;<\/strong>You might feel confused by what you\u2019re \nhearing. You might not understand how it could happen or why it has \nhappened. Sadly, sexual assaults are more common that we\u2019d like to \nthink. Although you may be struggling with feelings of confusion, \nespecially if you know the perpetrator, you should always try to&nbsp;believe\n the survivor. They are never to blame for the assault.<\/li><li><strong>Disbelief.<\/strong> When you first hear about the assault \nyou might be surprised or shocked, and you might have trouble believing \nthe assault happened. After a traumatic experience, it\u2019s common for \nsurvivors and those around them to experience denial. It\u2019s important to \nfocus on believing the survivor and acknowledging their story.<\/li><li><strong>Guilt.&nbsp;<\/strong>You may feel guilty that you could not \nprevent the assault from happening or that the survivor didn\u2019t feel \ncomfortable telling you about the assault right way. You may feel guilty\n that something so terrible happened to someone else and not to you. It \ncan be helpful to refocus your energy on making the survivor feel \nsupported as they move forward.<\/li><li><strong>Sadness.<\/strong> When you learn that a trauma like sexual \nassault happened to someone you care about, it\u2019s normal to feel sad, \nhopeless, worried, or powerless. You might feel sad for the survivor or \nmourn how this has changed their life. If you know the perpetrator, you \nmight feel sad for how this has changed your life as well. Self-care \nstrategies and coping skills can help you move through these feelings.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>How do I practice self care?<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p>Good self care enables you to better care for others, especially if  there is someone in your life who has survived sexual violence. The principles of self care for friends and family are similar to the self-care concepts for survivors, but there are some additional aspects to consider.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li><strong>Maintain your lifestyle. <\/strong>It  can be difficult to stay emotionally strong if you are mostly focusing  on the sexual assault. Maintaining your lifestyle and continuing to do  what you enjoy is important for your emotional wellness. If you enjoy  painting, cooking, exercising, spending time with friends, or other  activities, keep them up. It may seem challenging to make time to do  these activities, but they can be helpful self-care strategies in the  long-run.<\/li><li><strong>Make plans.\u00a0<\/strong>Sometimes talking about what happened  can help you cope with your feelings, and other times it can make you  feel more stuck. Make plans that give you a break from talking or  thinking about the assault. It could mean\u00a0starting a new hobby or  revisiting one you already enjoy. You could go to dinner with a group of  friends who understand this isn&#8217;t time to discuss what happened. Maybe  you prefer a solo activity, like going on long walks. Let this be a time  where you can take your mind off the assault.<\/li><li><strong>Reach out and talk about it. <\/strong> It\u2019s normal to have a  difficult time processing the sexual assault of someone you care about.  It can continue to be difficult as time goes on and the survivor begins  the healing process. You can <a href=\"http:\/\/myunheardvoice.org\/ru\/gethelp\/\">chat with someone <\/a>who understands what you\u2019re going through. You can  also consider talking to someone who is trained professionally to help  you deal with these thoughts and feelings, like a mental health  professional.<\/li><li><strong>Take time to relax.<\/strong> Relaxation looks different for  everyone. You might consider meditation or deep breathing exercises.  Maybe journaling helps you sort through your thoughts and find peace.  Build time into your day for these moments of relaxation so that you  don\u2019t skip out.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Legal Disclaimer<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p style=\"font-size:12px\"><strong>MyUnheardVoice website provides general information that is intended, but not guaranteed, to be correct and up-to-date. The information is not presented as a source of legal advice. You should not rely, for legal advice, on statements or representations made within the website or by any externally referenced Internet sites. If you need legal advice upon which you intend to rely in the course of your legal affairs, consult a competent, independent attorney. MUV does not assume any responsibility for actions or non-actions taken by people who have visited this site, and no one shall be entitled to a claim for detrimental reliance on any information provided or expressed.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p style=\"font-size:12px\"><em>Original source link: https:\/\/rainn.org\/articles\/self-care-friends-and-family<\/em><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It\u2019s important to know that there is no normal or one way to react when you find out someone you care about has survived an act<span class=\"excerpt-hellip\"> [\u2026]<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-305","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/myunheardvoice.org\/ru\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/305","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/myunheardvoice.org\/ru\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/myunheardvoice.org\/ru\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/myunheardvoice.org\/ru\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/myunheardvoice.org\/ru\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=305"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/myunheardvoice.org\/ru\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/305\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":306,"href":"https:\/\/myunheardvoice.org\/ru\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/305\/revisions\/306"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/myunheardvoice.org\/ru\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=305"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}